Author Topic: Only in Australia!  (Read 1541 times)

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Offline Nosaj

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Only in Australia!
« on: September 06, 2009, 10:32:15 PM »
ONLY AUSSIES

Being Australian is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for A Belgian beer, then on the way home, grabbing an Indian curry or A Turkish kebab, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.

Oh and..... Only in Australia .... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

Only in Australia ... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in Australia ... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET coke.
Only in Australia ... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.
Only in Australia ... do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

NOT TO MENTION.....

3 Aussies die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.

58 Aussies are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.

31 Aussies have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.

8 Aussies had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.

A massive 543 Aussies were admitted to Emergency in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.

and finally.........

In 2000 eight Aussies cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet.


Offline Teeman

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Re: Only in Australia!
« Reply #1 on: September 07, 2009, 01:27:40 AM »
Pretty sure it originally had the USA in place of Australia.

And it was a German who invented the kebab ;)
[Psychonaut] Sounds like Black Sabbath having rough sex with NWOBHM while 'early' Slayer jerks off in the corner  :cunning:

Offline goatlady

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Re: Only in Australia!
« Reply #2 on: September 07, 2009, 03:37:51 AM »
And it was a German who invented the kebab ;)

While we're splitting hairs, it was the German turks who invented the kebab... but they like it in a bun not flat bread and no cunt anywhere other than Perth has ever heard of putting a fried egg in one.

Offline goat

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Re: Only in Australia!
« Reply #3 on: September 09, 2009, 08:10:51 PM »
And it was a German who invented the kebab ;)

While we're splitting hairs, it was the German turks who invented the kebab...

who probably ripped it off from someone else.