Let me try to summarise.
Around 10. last night we heard a massive bang - really massive - like a bomb going off. We all raced out the front of the Daz house to see a scene right out of kandahar. two cars that were parked on the verge parallel to the road were now adjacent to it and complete rightoffs, and there were two other cars with substantial damage and three others with minor damage.
And then there was a car up the road about 50m ahead which was virtally missing from the windscreen forwards, no panels, no wheels, only half an engine and with two drunk idiots in the front. UNHURT. And there was a trail of wreckage all the way up the street.
This is pieced together from police and witnesses. It appears this guy was driving down Amazon DR (50km limit) at around 130KMH-150KMH in a high performance subaru. He has failed to negotiate the curve of the road, and hit the first car, a Ford as I recall. They have bounced off it, hit the Island and lost control, slammed into a Forrester and a Commodore ute, which then slammed into a little four cylinder (I forget which) causing complete destruction to the Forrester and ute and a pile of damage to the 4. Wreckage has peppered the cars on both sides of the street and the remains of the subaru has skidded onwards on what little remained on its undercarriage. Apologies to anyone I have forgotten here.
I think I got to the wreck first, to find two very drunk idiots covered in brake fluid sitting stunned in the wreckage. As we were helping them out the driver was set upon by a gaggle of drug-addled blackfellas who apparently narrowly missed being hit by these clowns, and naturally things got out of hand with a few punches being thrown and so on. There were other outrageous incidents and no end of people showing up to add to the confusion, and when the cops arrived (about 15 minus later
) they discovered that nobody was admitting to driving the car. They eventually gleaned enough information from we uncooperative metalheads and arrested the twits, and then began two hours of taking statements, towing away piles of "car" and the like. We all then went and drank some more.
The damage bill seems to be around $110 000, and at least one of the cars involved was uninsured. There will be a great many years of paying money back for this bloke, and yet you gotta think that someone was prayin' for this twit, because Daz's parties are known as being busy and rowdy with people spilling out into the street but this one party NOBODY was out the front and NOBODY was hurt. NOBODY was smoking joints in the car and became a statistic, and statistically that has to be incredible in itself.
Even more amazingly, the cops said that If the tool had NOT hit the cars, they would have ended up ploughing right through the front wall of Daz's home and at 130KMH and more, they would have gone right through. There would have been deaths.
You gotta say it: Daz knows how to throw a memorable bash.