Author Topic: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick  (Read 21483 times)

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Offline HappySinner

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The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« on: December 17, 2005, 12:20:04 PM »
An oily drizzle misted over the treeless plain, descending slowly as if reluctant to touch the ruined earth. The rain was tepid and rank, and did nothing to refresh or cleanse the two weary travelers picking their way between rocks and coarse grasses that caught at their cloaks and boots with every step. Pack animals were useless in this terrain, so the horses had been set free to meet whatever end awaited them. The travelers carried only their weapons and small packs containing the last of their supplies. They were nearing the end of their quest, and although night was falling there would be no sleeping on the Plains of Bezel, where the sodden ground and thorny vegetation offered no comfort or solace for bruised feet and aching muscles. Ahead lay the Living Forest, and then the final climb to the Mount of Orms, where the intrepid adventurers would finally achieve one of two things - the complete fulfillment of their souls (the very reason for their long and torturous journey)... or death. The pair, although from disparate backgrounds, were bound by this common quest, a bond as deep as any blood tie. Their fates were intertwined, both caught in a current not of their making, but one drawing them ever nearer to their final confrontation with whatever creature or being presided over the perpetually cloud-obscured top of the Mount of Orms. The entity had a name, though it was rarely spoken, and even then in a hushed whisper. The travelers knew it - indeed, it had been that very name that had drawn them together on this quest - but neither man had uttered it aloud since their first meeting, weeks earlier.

The taller and older of the two was known as HappySinner in his homeland, where he had been for years a wandering minstrel with very little need for or knowledge of weapons of war. His guitar was no longer hanging on his shoulder on this day, replaced with a broad two-handed sword and a longbow at journey’s beginning. His craggy visage now showed that he was a stranger to battle no more, the set of brow and jaw speaking volumes of the experiences that had led him to this place.
By his side strode a stocky man whose youthful appearance belied his determination and effectiveness in battle. He was WarNick, born into a warrior caste but employed as court musician to his chieftain, as he was an entertaining fellow, and as handy with a guitar as he was with a shortsword or spear. A favourite with the young women of his tribe, he left many a broken heart the day he left on his personal crusade for the ultimate instrument. He knew full well the perils he would face, and considered his meeting with this rangy, world-weary minstrel along the way a fortuitous one indeed, considering the skill with which he had learned to master his bow and blade.

The two had had their resolve put to the test shortly after leaving civilization behind when they were set upon by a rabble of grotesque troll/human bandits. That day, many bandits died, and a bond was forged in blood. HappySinner and WarNick were now nearing the end of their journey, but each knew without words what the other was thinking - no man had made it this far and lived to tell of what he had found. Already the two had faced creatures of ground and air that defied description, and only the occasional fragment of bone betrayed the presence of anything remotely human. Many a brave soul had ventured in search of the Mount of Orms and all that it promised, but none had returned with their personal musical holy grail, or even made it as far as these unlikely brothers-in-arms. Beyond lay unimaginable terrors this was true, but there was still that shrouded mountain ahead, beckoning the pair to meet their fates with a terrible fascination - a fascination that could only be satisfied by one of two things... To gain possession of the instrument that humbled angelsong...

or total obliteration.
« Last Edit: December 18, 2005, 04:34:02 AM by HappySinner »
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Offline Ormsby_Guitars

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick - Pt1
« Reply #1 on: December 17, 2005, 10:01:12 PM »
lol, we are going to need a storytime section on my website me thinks :P

Offline EvilElvis

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick - Pt1
« Reply #2 on: December 17, 2005, 10:45:18 PM »
just finish their fuckin' guitars already!  ;D

Offline DuskyBlackcat

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick - Pt1
« Reply #3 on: December 17, 2005, 11:07:46 PM »
baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahhahahahahahhahahah

BRILLIANT!!  

Bullshit... but BRILLIANT... ;D :-*

Hurry Pez... he's going mad....

Eloquent work G.  8)
I can see the film clip now  ;)
« Last Edit: December 17, 2005, 11:08:34 PM by DuskyBlackcat »
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Offline Nosaj

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick - Pt1
« Reply #4 on: December 17, 2005, 11:55:50 PM »
It's a fabrication, part of his Evil plan to take over WF and turn it into his Glam Empire. 8)
So what kind of Metal classification would You give to CuntScrape?

I would say Thush Metal.

Offline LeOniuS

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick - Pt1
« Reply #5 on: December 18, 2005, 03:21:28 AM »
The man has a talent for writing I must admit..

Offline chewie

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick - Pt1
« Reply #6 on: December 18, 2005, 03:25:05 AM »
funny fukka

Offline HappySinner

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #7 on: December 18, 2005, 05:47:19 AM »
The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
Part 2.

The last vestiges of daylight had fled the sky when HappySinner and WarNick stopped to sup from their meagre supplies. There was nowhere to sleep on the rocky ground, which was sodden from the past days’ rains, but they would be at the Living Forest before dawn, and they would rest then. For now, the travelers ate and pondered the remainder of their journey.

“D’you think they’re true - the stories about the Living Forest?” said WarNick, as he twisted a handful of dry grass into a bundle and tossed it on the small fire they had built. “I’ve heard that the trees actually move like a huge wooden army when the mood takes them”.
“I have heard the tales” replied HappySinner, who sat sharpening the points of his remaining arrows. “But if there is a man who has returned with an eyewitness account of such a thing, I have yet to meet him. I would not discount anything, though - this land is full of abominations beyond the understanding of mortal men, so we had best watch our step through the forest”.
The young warrior nodded slowly as he gazed into the flickering flames. His thoughts drifted back to his village, to the buxom lasses who had tearfully bid him farewell as he left the safety of his lands for a destination unknown. In particular, the lithe and lovely Naoma. Ah, Naoma, who had hair of silk and skin like...
“Are you ready, lad?” HappySinner’s voice broke WarNick’s reverie, and he shook his head to clear the distracting memory as he gathered his pack and weapons together. “I’ll be glad to get away from these cursed rocks and onto level ground, even if it is full of walking trees” he said as he hefted his pack. “Lead on, Sinner.” As they broke camp, HappySinner looked back at the endless plain of rocks and wiry grass, and then turned to gaze at their destination, now covered by darkness. A night’s march would bring them to the Living Forest where they would encounter new obstacles, and probably new creatures of an ilk heretofore unimagined by mortals. There was no going back now, he thought to himself as he accustomed his eyes to the gloom. There was only one way to go, and that was forward - forward into he knew not what, but in the back of his mind there dwelt a melody, evanescent as a fleeting shadow that disappeared as soon as he tried to focus on its strains. Sinner knew that his companion heard a similar melody that drove him on, that could only be fully realized by being played on only one instrument - the instrument that was to be found at the very top of the Mount of Orms. To hear that melody finally played, each man would have to endure whatever lay between him and his goal, and that endurance had already been sorely tested by the trials the two had faced together. With grim determination, the minstrel and the warrior trudged on, each lost in his own thoughts as they marched towards their next challenge - to survive the Living Forest.
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Samoth

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #8 on: December 18, 2005, 05:55:13 AM »
Ahahahaha dude when the FUCK do you do all this?  ;D

Offline HappySinner

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #9 on: December 18, 2005, 06:00:49 AM »
I just sit and type, and it comes out on the spot.
It's a kind of controlled mental diarrhoea.  :)

Now ssshhhh... there'll be more soon...
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Offline HappySinner

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #10 on: December 19, 2005, 02:05:49 AM »
The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
Part 3.

As dawn probed with tentative fingers through a murky sky, HappySinner and WarNick rested on their packs at the edge of the Living Forest. They had arrived in the pre-dawn dark, and had decided to wait for some sort of daylight before venturing under that ominous canopy. It was yet to be seen if any light at all would penetrate the dense foliage high above, and the two men prepared to find out as they shouldered their weapons and ever lightening packs.

“I don’t think it’ll be getting any brighter than this” said HappySinner, looking up at the overcast sky. “Let’s go”.
The pair approached the first of the trees and paused, examining the gnarled bark on the massive trunk. The bark was moist and slimy to the touch, and the trunk rose almost into darkness before the lowest of its branches spread to merge with those of the next tree. From the base of each tree sprung huge twisted roots that burrowed into the ground to find nourishment, and it was at such a root WarNick was looking when he said, “Well, they don’t look too mobile to me, Sirrah - I’d wager the army of trees is just the babbling of a drunken wanderer.”
HappySinner chuckled softly and turned a wry smile on his friend. “I’d wager you may be right, lad. But I’m thinking that the trees themselves might not have been the reason for this forest’s name.” He stepped back from inspecting the tree and settled his pack on his shoulders. There was no path between the trees, but there was one gap between two trunks that was noticeably wider than the rest, and lead directly into the heart of the Living Forest. This was the way the pair stepped, WarNick casting a last glance back at what he though might be the last sky he would see for some time.

They had not gone far when HappySinner said, “We may be able to make it to the other side of the forest before nightfall if we push hard, Nick. I have a feeling that this will not be a good place to spend the night.”
The young warrior looked up at the canopy of branches and leaves under which they walked. The interior of the forest by day was a perpetual twilight, with very little noise save for the occasional slithering or scurrying sound, and the sound of their own footfalls, muffled by a carpet of fallen leaves and creeping vines. “We’ll get not moonlight or starshine under this lot” he replied sullenly, then brightened. “I made some bundles of that plain grass and put them in my pack. They burn slowly, and we could make it a short way by their light if we had to.”
HappySinner smiled at his companion’s resourcefulness. “Well done, lad. We will probably need them, even if we get through this before nightfall. I really have no idea what lies beyond here.” He looked about them, peering into the gloom with tense concentration. “There’s something... I just can’t... There’s something.” HappySinner continued walking in silence then, but WarNick noticed that his pace had quickened imperceptibly. There was something troubling the lanky minstrel, and he was keeping it to himself.
Increasing his stride to match the gait of the taller man, WarNick said, “I don’t think there are any large animals in this forest. I have been listening and looking for signs of their passing, but all I hear is what sounds like rats and snakes.” He looked sideways at his companion. “Are you sensing something I’m not?”
“Something knows we’re here.”
“Something? What?”
“I haven’t seen or heard anything you haven’t” said HappySinner, stepping over a knotted root that thrust a gnarled finger into his path. “But I feel something here.” He placed a hand over his solar plexus and cast an uncertain glance about them. “There is something in this forest, but it may be neither beast, nor man. There is something else at work here.”
WarNick shuddered, pulled his cloak more firmly about his shoulders, and walked on in silence. Serves you bloody right for asking, he thought to himself.
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Offline jarrydn

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #11 on: December 19, 2005, 03:42:46 AM »
I'm pretty sure I've seen you throw solar plexus into another story of yours.

I admire that. I don't think I've ever even typed that word, let alone used it in any context.

Offline HappySinner

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #12 on: December 19, 2005, 04:22:17 AM »
That would have been my little vignette, 'Herschel gets a new Solar Plexus'. ;)
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Offline TnT

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #13 on: December 19, 2005, 10:47:10 PM »
Hahahah

But the story just doesn't seem right without Nick's other travelling companion, and you seemed to just gloss over the eating part.


Offline WarNick

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #14 on: December 20, 2005, 05:09:49 AM »
We didn't want to open that can of worms but when we ran out of rations we were forced to clock him over the back of the head and eat him, he was the obvious choice because he was the plumpest and also consumed the most.

Offline HappySinner

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #15 on: December 20, 2005, 06:40:34 AM »
*urp*

:D
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Offline HappySinner

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #16 on: December 20, 2005, 01:40:40 PM »
The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
Part 4.

After what seemed to WarNick to be an eternity of silent marching, HappySinner called a halt, judging that the day was perhaps half spent, and the two men ate a sparse meal of dried meat and hard biscuits washed down with a tea made from a bitter herb that gave the drinker stamina and strength. As they ate, they discussed their situation and their chances of success, or indeed, of survival.
“It’s hard to judge the time without being able to see the sky, but it must be close to midday, by my reckoning” said HappySinner as he gnawed on a piece of leathery meat from his supplies. “I’ve noticed the days getting longer as we’ve headed north, so we may have an extra hour or two to get clear of this forest.”
WarNick grimaced at the bitter dregs of his restorative tea and shoved the empty mug into his pack. “You judge us to be halfway through this maze of logs and vines, then?”
HappySinner nodded. “The ground started sloping up a little while back, so we’re well above the level of the plain now.” He let out a long, slow breath and sat quietly, listening to the forest. It was deathly still. Not even a rustling of leaves disturbed the damp silence. A frown creased the brow of the minstrel, and he turned to WarNick, his voice sounding unusually loud after the overbearing absence of noise. “There’s a sound that’s been missing the whole time we’ve been walking through this blasted wood.”
“What do you...” the young warrior began, then stopped. “Of course.” He looked up into the gloomy heights above them. “Birds. We’ve heard no birdsong. Not even a carrion bird screeching.” He thought a moment longer. “Come to think of it, there has been no airborne life of any sort since we crossed that godforsaken plain.”
“Not even an insect” agreed HappySinner. “I find that most unusual. Every living thing in this forest crawls on the ground. I haven’t even seen anything climbing a tree.”
“Maybe it’s not safe to be too noticeable in here” said WarNick. “I don’t see how anything could fly in amongst that mess up there anyway.” He indicated the twisted canopy receding to gloom far above them. HappySinner was about to answer his companion, but caught his breath and put a hand to the side of his head. A strange buzzing, just beyond the threshold of hearing, seemed to fill his skull with a dissonant subsonic thrumming. He looked at WarNick, wondering if he was imagining what was happening to him. The warrior had sprung up as if struck, drawing his shortsword with fear and alarm on his face. He looked around himself quickly then staggered with dizziness at the sudden movement of his head. HappySinner, not sure if he was ‘hearing’ or ‘feeling’ the mind-numbing vibrations, was struggling to find his feet when the vibration, as suddenly as it had appeared, vanished. The two travelers stared at each other, neither willing to speak. It was obvious to them that they had not imagined what had just happened.
WarNick, his breathing slowly returning to normal, sheathed his sword and looked at HappySinner, who was still leaning against the trunk of a nearby tree.
“Was that the something you were worried about? It felt like a thousand bees buzzing in my skull - but it wasn’t really a sound...” His youthful face was a study in confusion.
“I don’t know, but something else happened in the time that we were ‘hearing’ that vibration” said the rangy wanderer as he shook the last of the fog from his mind. “Look at the trees.”
“Huh? The trees?” WarNick looked at the colossal trunks surrounding them. His hand shot back to the hilt of his shortsword. “By all the gods, above and below... the trees!”
“That’s right” said HappySinner. “The trees... they’ve moved! In fact, I have a feeling that we’re not really looking at trees at all.”
“Not really...” WarNick was astonished. “What the hell are you talking about?”
“I think I should tell you about it as we walk, lad.” HappySinner cast a worried glance around them and shouldered his pack. “We may not have as much time as I thought.”
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Offline Mago_Haydz

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #17 on: December 20, 2005, 06:06:30 PM »
ooooh.....the suspense is getting greater as the warriors travel farther.....
Mongeese like results

Offline Ormsby_Guitars

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #18 on: December 20, 2005, 06:49:15 PM »
Graham, just so you know, because it might effect the storyline....

I am moving the workshop from the top of Orms mountain, to the other side of the scary forrest. When you get through, you'll see a sign giving directions to turn around :P

Offline HappySinner

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #19 on: December 21, 2005, 12:13:06 AM »
Storyline, schmoryline... You'll meet your grisly end when and where I decide, humang...  :P
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Offline Boginator

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #20 on: December 21, 2005, 09:54:11 AM »
Have you ever the of changing the name of the story to somthing like Lord of The Strings.

Offline HappySinner

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #21 on: December 21, 2005, 01:47:45 PM »
Actually, that very name has come up in connection with a musical project I was discussing with a friend - maybe the soundtrack album?  ;)
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Offline HappySinner

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #22 on: December 21, 2005, 01:52:40 PM »
The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
Part 5.

The pair set off at a brisk pace, spurred on by their short but harrowing experience. The trees had indeed moved, drawing closer together and seeming to increase in girth, making the spaces between them noticeably narrower. Although the men still had a reasonably clear passage through the trees, neither one wanted to spend any more time under that vile canopy than was absolutely necessary. The strange, disorienting effects of that mysterious vibration had shaken them both to the core of their beings, and the realization that the Living Forest was much more than it appeared added urgency to their stride. Creatures that slithered and scurried were forgotten as a bigger, more immediate danger made itself known.

WarNick carried his spear across his chest now, ready to defend himself against he knew not what. His eyes flicked left and right as he regarded the slimy trunks around him with obvious distaste. They hadn’t moved - not that he’d noticed, anyway - since the vibration, but he was beginning to feel claustrophobic, as if the trees were drinking up more than their share of the humid air in the forest. Sinner’s last words were playing on his mind - if these things surrounding them weren’t actually trees, then what were they? How could they move, being rooted in the ground? As if hearing his companion’s thoughts, HappySinner said, “I think I know why this place is called the Living Forest now.”
WarNick turned his attention fully upon his friend. “You think?”
“I can’t be sure” replied the older man, not slackening his pace “but I don’t think these trees are individuals. I think they are all part of a whole.”
“You mean they’re all one tree?” WarNick was sceptical.
“Not exactly. When we were eating back there, I was looking up at the lower branches of the forest canopy. I saw branches joining the trunks - not tangled together, but growing between them. I wouldn’t be surprised if every tree in this forest is connected in the same way.”
“So this... forest is actually a single organism?” WarNick looked ill. “And we’re walking though its guts.” He spat on the ground and shook his head. The ground had an obvious upward slope now, and the muscles in his legs were feeling the strain. They had not slowed since their midday meal, and the effects of the restorative drink were waning.
HappySinner stopped suddenly, putting out a hand to halt his partner-in-arms. “Wait” he said.
“For what?”
“Listen.”
There it was - WarNick felt/heard a faint buzzing in his head, the same one he’d sensed before. This time, however, he could also hear a humming around them, filling the air with a deep dissonance. He tried to locate a source of the sound, but failed. Looking at HappySinner, he followed the minstrel’s gaze upward. The vibration was stronger in the forest canopy. WarNick’s head swam, and he shook it to clear his senses. HappySinner spoke between clenched teeth.
“The forest is moving again. We have to hurry.” He made to stride off, and pitched face forward into the thick leafy covering of the forest floor. While they stood talking, a thick, sinuous vine had looped an exploring tendril around Sinner’s boot unbeknownst to him, and it had held fast when he tried to walk. Reeling from the effects of the vibration that filled his senses, WarNick struggled to free his shortsword from its scabbard as HappySinner lay stunned. Finally managing to draw his blade, the young warrior hacked the vine clear of his partner’s boot. Sheathing the sword, he helped HappySinner to his feet and looked around. The forest was showing alarming signs of animation - the trunks were pulsating as if drawing breath, and a hissing sound came from overhead, blending with the infernal vibration that clouded their thoughts.
HappySinner’s eyes cleared, and he focused on his young friend. “Thanks, Nick. We’ve got to be nearing the far edge of the forest - do you have the rest of those grass torches?”
“Right here.” WarNick shook his pack. The vibration was getting stronger, filling the air.
“Have them ready” said HappySinner grimly, drawing his gleaming broadsword. “If we're not as close to the edge of this... thing as I hoped, we’re going to need them to fight our way out.”
« Last Edit: December 21, 2005, 01:59:28 PM by HappySinner »
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Offline Nosaj

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #23 on: December 22, 2005, 08:17:49 AM »
This is very enthralling.  :o
So what kind of Metal classification would You give to CuntScrape?

I would say Thush Metal.

Offline nihilist

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Re: The Tale of HappySinner and WarNick
« Reply #24 on: December 23, 2005, 12:58:23 AM »
Is it?
My hands are choking, my knife is broken.
An orgasm is what I need.
Your blood is spilling, the sight is thrilling.
To cum I need to see you bleed.